What is love? Baby don’t hurt me…
Seriously, what is love? Neurology?
Despite centuries of obsession, it still overwhelms us to this day.
The word love simply tries to represent too many ideas. I honestly think it would be good if the word simply disappeared and we can stop using such a broad word.
It’s what you feel towards someone or something that makes you happy.
if love is a thing we can define, how can it mean so many contradictory things?
Robert Sternberg had 26 things about love. Each represent something that we associate with this one word. For example, love is often said to be an addiction, something that you want despite being harmful.
I have to mention though, “the courage to be happy” says that love is a promise that represents courage. Love is a feeling where you really respect someone. The notes I took on the book are misplaced though, I think I did notes on paper. I wish it wasn’t like this.
1. Addiction. Strong anxious attachment; clinging behavior; anxiety at thought of losing partner.
2. Art. Love of partner for physical attractiveness; importance to person of partner’s always looking good.
- Business. Relationships as business propositions; money is power; partners in close relationships as business partners.
4. Collection. Partner viewed as “fitting in” to some overall scheme; partner viewed in a detached way.
5. Cookbook. Doing things a certain way (recipe) results is relationship being more likely to work out; departure from recipe for success leads to increased likelihood of failure.
6. Fantasy. Often expects to be saved by a knight in shining armor or to marry a princess and live happily ever after.
7. Game. Love as a game or sport.
8. Gardening. Relationships need to be continually nurtured and tended to.
9. Government. (a) Autocratic. One partner dominates or even controls other. (b) Democratic. Two partners equally share power.
History. Events of relationship form an indelible record; keep a lot of records—mental or physical.
Horror. Relationships become interesting when you terrorize or are terrorized by your partner.
House and Home. Relationships have their core in the home, through its development and maintenance.
Humor. Love is strange and funny.
Mystery. Love is a mystery and you shouldn’t let too much of yourself be known.
Police. You’ve got to keep close tabs on your partner to make sure he/she toes the line, or you need to be under surveillance to make sure you behave.
Pornography. Love is dirty, and to love is to degrade or be degraded.
Recovery. Survivor mentality; view that after past trauma, person can get through practically anything.
Religion. Either views love as a religion, or love as a set of feelings and activities dictated by religion.
Sacrifice. To love is to give of oneself or for someone to give of him or herself to you.
Science. Love can be understood, analyzed, and dissected, just like any other natural phenomenon.
Science Fiction. Feeling that partner is like an alien—incomprehensible and very strange.
Sewing. Love is whatever you make it.
Theater. Love is scripted, with predictable acts, scenes, and lines.
Travel. Love is a journey.
War. Love is a series of battles in a devastating but continuing war.
Student-teacher. Love is a relationship between a student and a teacher.